68 Days 'til Halloween: The Heckler

On my list of things that I love every Halloween is the kid "heckler".

It's the one Trick or Treater you can hear coming from the end of the driveway announcing themselves with statements like...

 "This ain't scary!"

Up close, they do some annoying head shaking dance while chanting...

"Oooo Frank-en-stupid, you're soooooo scary."

Of course they still want candy, but instead of saying "trick or treat" they act as if it's a showdown...

"What ya gonna do Frankenstein? HUH? I'm taking the candy! Come on, you gonna stop me?

I give them the candy, just to move things along. Next, they usually stand off to the side and heckle for a few minutes or so, reveling in their perceived victory over the monster. I wait patiently, doing nothing.

Once they grow bored and decide to move on I strike. When they turn around to leave, I stand up and walk fast, but quietly, catching up to them. When literally inches from their heels, I'll silently follow until they spin around sensing a presence and see me towering above them.

The heckler always... ALWAYS... shrieks and runs scared down the block.

Revenge is a dish best served stealthily.


  1. Couple years ago, my buddy was dressed as Ed Gein / Leatherface and would wait til they started to walk away then drag his carbon steel butcher knife across the concrete. The shower of sparks was all it took to get them a running.

  2. I know that kid...there's one at every house. Great way to teach him a lesson.

  3. that's fantastic! wish i could trick or treat in your neighborhood!